Tuesday, November 3, 2009

How to be a good party guest

With the party season upon us, some tips on how to be a good guest:

1) Do not be Mr. or Ms. Soliloquy. I know you could talk forever on the type of toilet you're going to install in the basement bathroom, or your kid's latest puke story, or your favourite cleaning products, or even nuclear physics. But after a solid 10 minutes, it's time to share the glory and the conversation.

2) Read people's body cues - yawning and droopy eyelids are bad. Try to spice things up with some Tom Cruise or Lindsay Lohan gossip (make something up as I'm sure they did it at some point and maybe even together!).

3) Wipe the wee off the toilet seat unless there's a kid close by that you can blame the mess on.

4) Be extra careful with red wine and white furniture. One misstep and you will always be "that guy that ruined the host's life and their overpriced Italian one-of-a-kind piece" and more importantly, you'll miss out on the free food and wine next party.

5) If the hosts are flossing, you've overstayed your welcome. Get out immediately and send a flowery thank you note ASAP.

6) 24 ounces in one person is too much!

7) And since I'm soon hosting, you can never go wrong with a hostess gift - even inedible cookies - because it's the thought that counts (and the guy who drank 24 oz. will eat them).


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